| Name: |
| Andrea in the USA |
| I'm here: |
| Seeking restoration for my marriage. |
| What is your current marital status? Please be sure to choose the one that BEST describes your situation. |
| Separated: I am married, but my husband does not live with me. |
| Have you read the book "How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage?" |
| Yes |
| How did you find our ministry? |
| In the book. |
| Now, please tell us about your situation and why you have come to us for help and what has your husband/partner said are the main issues or problems he has with you and your relationship? |
| My husband and I have been married for ten years. About 5 years ago, both of us got into drugs really bad, lost custody of our son to my mother-in-law, got pregnant again and lost custody of our daughter to my sister-in-law. After that, we got sober and my husband has maintained his sobriety for over two years now. It has been much more of a struggle for me. I made it a little over a year and then started using again, hiding it and lying to him. Eventually he found out and left me. I got clean, found Recovery and a wonderful church, and got serious about doing things God's way, and God restored my husband to me.
We were so happy for the past year, but gradually I slacked off on praying and little sins crept back in that have lead me back down the same road. I started having cravings and instead of leaning on my husband, I let them fester and eventually caved and used again a little over two months ago. It was only once and I came clean to him immediately afterward, but he still asked me to leave and stopped coming to our church. At first he said he would wait while I stayed with my brother and grandmother and got my act together, but not long after he said he was done and about a week ago, he told me he's started talking to another woman. My marriage is so precious to me and I have fought so hard for years to keep it together. I was so grateful to God for restoring it. How could I have let this happen again? My husband says the main issue is that he can't trust me. He says he can't even begin to mend things when he doesn't trust me. Also his family has started to open up to him and let him see our children, which he says would stop if he let me back in. I have come to You for help because I read God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage just over a month ago and I feel like I am failing to implement it in my life on my own. I pray not just at scheduled times, but talk to the Lord throughout the day and read my Bible regularly. I have surrounded myself with scripture, but I know that one of my tests is to treat my grandmother with love and patience, and it is in that that I am failing. She has dementia, is very contentious, and will start throwing fits and being cruel to me at the drop of a hat. How will I ever be a "completely transformed into the image of God" woman when I can't seem to go one day without rising to the bait? |
| Please use the space below to simply speak to God, in your own words, pouring your heart out to Him. |
| Lord, how long? Please come and heal my marriage again. I love and miss my husband so much and feel so lost without him. Half of my flesh is missing, Lord! I am broken with the loss of it. How could I do this to him again? I know that You have given me this time alone to grow close to You. Why am I unable to be at peace with it? Every morning I pray and read the psalms and verses on my walls and feel like I've successfully put in in Your hands, but by the afternoon I am a weeping wreck and holding on for dear life again. I want to choose You. Why can't I for any meaningful length of time? Please help me to let go and trust You completely with my marriage. Please help me to wait on You and Your timing. Please help me to sow peace into my brother's household. I am so tired of being this sinful woman, Lord! Please change my heart and give me peace! |
| In order for us to minister more effectively to you, please check what concerns apply to you: |
| Thankfully I have no other concerns other than my relationship at this time. |
| Are you interested in learning how you can help other women who are in marriage crisis as a Marriage Minister ? CLICK on the IMAGE that describes you right now. |
| Yes, maybe in the future . Please send me the information to pray about it. |
| Finally, please choose how you would like us to conduct your Marriage Evaluation from the choices below. |
| Posting your questionnaire Privately to an assigned IOU Marriage Ministry Student. Sample |
Please Note: We ask that you reply to this post ONLY if you are an IOU Student working towards qualifying for your Marriage Minister Certificate.
Example:
Before commenting, remember to:
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- Speak to your Husband, your Maker, to know what He wants to say to this brokenhearted bride.
- Keep it SHORT.
- Encourage sharing 1-2 Promises.
- Bridge to the course He used to lead you along your Restoration Journey.
- After 3 MM Comments and the comments are CLOSED for this session, please continue to encourage by confirming what the ministers are saying by replying beneath their MM Comments.
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Hi Andrea. I am familiar with situations like yours. It is sooo common in my city (drugs, children being in foster care, etc) unfortunately it’s almost treated like a normal thing here. Also, my eh has used for years. I am in waiting season for the Lord to heal and transform him. It was so hard for me last year I became bitter and angry with him and told him to leave. After a month, my Beloved had something just take over me and I went from having a hard heart to feelings of love and forgiveness in an instant. Don’t quit. He changed my heart to ask my husbands forgiveness and to come back home (even though it took a while because I pushed him into the arms of another) when I thought I was “done” with him.
“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” Ex 14:14
If you haven’t already please go read https://hopeatlast.com/c2/d15-the-freedom-of-letting-go/#comment-2616.
Start our courses (https://hopeatlast.com/rrr/), pour your heart into your Lesson Forms and be sure to journal.
Also, before my restorations (I’ve been restored 2x) the chapter from the RYM and Wise Woman Book helped me tremendously. https://hopeatlast.com/c3/day-10-chapter-5-won-without-a-word/ & https://hopeatlast.com/c3/day-8-chapter-3-a-gentle-and-quiet-spirit/ 💕
My dear Andrea, thank you for opening your heart to us. I can only imagine the journey you have been through, but I just want to remind you that you are truly loved by our Lord, you are precious to His eyes and He wants to heal you! The Lord gave me this Bible promise for you:
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16
When we confess our faults to Him, healing begins!
Because you shared how hard your healing has been, I want to recommend this resource He Healed Me: https://loveatlast.org/hhm/. We need healing to be able to let the Lord restore our lives!
Also, this one Restore Your Health: https://loveatlast.org/ryh/, The Lord wants to restore every little detail from our lives and if you surrender to Him, He will make it happen!
For your relationship with your husband, these chapters changed my life and helped to understand my journey and to trust only in Our Beloved Lord, The Freedom of Letting Go: https://hopeatlast.com/c2/d15-the-freedom-of-letting-go/ and Tell it to Your Husband: https://loveatlast.org/ryr/c6.
My dear read this Salvation Story for more encouragement: https://loveatlast.org/fc/ss/wk5/
Take heart with the Lord everything is possible and any situation can be changed in a minute!
Dear, I have not experienced substance dependence, I have only had one family member who went through that situation and by the grace of God managed to get out. I believe that He is not finished with you, He is completing His work in you. I could identify with you in something that is the reason why the Lord has separated your husband’s heart from you, and that is the dependence I had on my earthly husband, which in some things seems like an addiction [obsession] because I couldn’t imagine or endure being away from him for a long time, as you say “I felt lost” I felt that without him I couldn’t move forward or do anything in life. My Beloved needed to free me from that wrong thinking, that’s why I used separation to show myself that what I really needed was Him, that only from Him comes everything I have and receive in my life. You are beginning this process of transformation. He has heard your cry and he wants to transform you. What you need to heal is an intimate and personal relationship with the Lord as your Heavenly Husband.
My Beloved encourages me to share with you my testimony of a restored marriage https://elanimador.com/me-bendijo-con-su-gran-amor/ Also this lesson that he reminds me of at this moment: https://hopeatlast.com/ c2/d19-gods-makeover/ and I encourage you to take all our courses on the page, as I see that you already have a base on restoration, you can check the ones you need at https://hopeatlast.com/rrr/, Be sure to go through Course 1 https://hopeatlast.com/c1/ to read the testimonies and watch the encouraging videos that have a lot of wisdom and at https://loveatlast.org/ where you can have access to the life courses abundant that change lives and lead you to fall in love with the Lord as your Heavenly Husband, and thus depend on HIM, which is exactly what you need even more for your emotional healing. Remember to complete your journals at the end of each lesson because with them you pour out your heart to the Lord allowing Him to know you and heal you.
We hope to hear from you on our blog!! https://encouragingwomen.org/
Welcome!!
Hello dear Andrea, the first thing the Lord showed me for you was the following verse: “Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened; I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble.” of heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” M112830 My dear, I may not be able to understand the level of your test, but I do know the God who loves us and He Himself has told us that for Him there is nothing impossible.
My Beloved Lord encourages me to tell you that He is the one who wants to carry that weight for you, and He can assure you that He will not abandon you or leave you because that is His Promise.
As you say that you have already read the RYM book, the important thing is to fulfill and make the Word of the Lord a reality in our lives. I encourage you to study it again, making a journal for each chapter: https://hopeatlast.com/c1/, writing down what He shows you to do and then just apply it by taking it by the hand. It is time for you to be restored in the Lord while you are now alone with Him, as long as you dedicate yourself to renewing your mind and preparing yourself so that in this time He heals your wounds, the Lord Himself will take care of your marriage. Courage my dear, I know that the Lord has allowed this marital crisis to bless you in all areas of your life, He loves you and wants to rescue you and your family; https://loveatlast.org/fc/ss/wk5/
and there is a very important resource that He reminded me for you: https://loveatlast.org/hhm/
Dear Andrea, each of us is struggling with our own sins, which is why we all need the Lord. “The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.” Ps. 28:7 Only He can make the permanent changes in us so we all need to rely on him completely.
I see your longing for your earthly husband but do you know we have a Heavenly Husband who longs for us so much more than we could imagine? I encourage you to find Him – https://hopeatlast.com/c2/d22-heavenly-husband/
Many of us who found Him and are no longer in lack. “Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.”
“Thank you, we have a 3 Cord of comments supporting \o/\o/\o/ this bride. This session is now CLOSED.”